Single After Thirty: 15 Reasons it’s Not Totally Terrible
26MARSingle after 30? The internet is flooded with instructions to embrace your single status, how to love yourself and shitty advice imploring you to change your ways – or else. Fuck ‘em.
Being single in your twenties was fun. Then, one day you wake up and realize everyone got hitched. The drunk party photos that once clogged your Facebook feed have been replaced by copious amounts of ultrasound pics and shares of “parenting humor” images.
You feel out of the loop. And you probably are. But that’s okay. Being single after 30 doesn’t mean you’re a social degenerate. I mean, have you seen some of the people who get married?! Some are certifiably crazy. Others are downright repulsive. But… they got lucky. And.. you haven’t been lucky yet. On that note, here’s a few reasons I found to quit bemoaning your single status (and mine too).
2. Lounging on the sofa in my stained & tattered sweatpants, no bra and my hair in one giant knot – for as long as I choose.
3. Not required to shave every day. And never having to shave another’s back hair.
4. My friends are more fun. Plus, I don’t feel obligated to invite my guy along and try to fill him in on the inside jokes we’ve had for over 10 years.
5. I don’t have to attempt to hide the existence of this dating blog.
6. No boyfriend begging for a blow job when I’m on the heaviest day of my period.
7. I like hanging out with myself.
8. Not being woken up each time my guy gets out of bed to take a piss, drink water, etc. No worrying whether or not I was snoring. No snoring keeping me up.
9. Dating is providing plethora of writing material. More than I could have ever fathomed.
10. I’m not forced to listen to anyone else’s shitty music choices. (Seriously, how can the Goo Goo Dolls be your favorite band?)
11. Not sharing the couch. And not having to watch sports updates while sharing the couch.
12. No arguing over the thermostat setting.
13. No one tying up the bathroom taking a 30 minute shit when I need to do my hair, brush my teeth, etc.
14. Opportunity. Being single leaves you open to ANYTHING. You have the freedom to do whatever without the tether of another. Whether its traveling abroad, moving to LA to pursue a writing career or taking up sky-diving – you can do it. Besides, you never know when you’ll meet ‘the one.’ Better to be single when that happens than trapped in a sub-par relationship.
15. You’ve experienced a ton – so when the time comes to settle down you’ll be ready. Especially if you’ve dabbled in online dating – then you’ll REALLY be ready.
Not funny. At all. Period.
You feel out of the loop. And you probably are. But that’s okay. Being single after 30 doesn’t mean you’re a social degenerate. I mean, have you seen some of the people who get married?! Some are certifiably crazy. Others are downright repulsive. But… they got lucky. And.. you haven’t been lucky yet. On that note, here’s a few reasons I found to quit bemoaning your single status (and mine too).
15 Reasons to Not Hate Being Single After Thirty
1. Can go out with my guy friends whenever. Plus, I can vacation with my guy friends. No questions asked.2. Lounging on the sofa in my stained & tattered sweatpants, no bra and my hair in one giant knot – for as long as I choose.
3. Not required to shave every day. And never having to shave another’s back hair.
4. My friends are more fun. Plus, I don’t feel obligated to invite my guy along and try to fill him in on the inside jokes we’ve had for over 10 years.
5. I don’t have to attempt to hide the existence of this dating blog.
6. No boyfriend begging for a blow job when I’m on the heaviest day of my period.
7. I like hanging out with myself.
8. Not being woken up each time my guy gets out of bed to take a piss, drink water, etc. No worrying whether or not I was snoring. No snoring keeping me up.
9. Dating is providing plethora of writing material. More than I could have ever fathomed.
10. I’m not forced to listen to anyone else’s shitty music choices. (Seriously, how can the Goo Goo Dolls be your favorite band?)
11. Not sharing the couch. And not having to watch sports updates while sharing the couch.
12. No arguing over the thermostat setting.
13. No one tying up the bathroom taking a 30 minute shit when I need to do my hair, brush my teeth, etc.
14. Opportunity. Being single leaves you open to ANYTHING. You have the freedom to do whatever without the tether of another. Whether its traveling abroad, moving to LA to pursue a writing career or taking up sky-diving – you can do it. Besides, you never know when you’ll meet ‘the one.’ Better to be single when that happens than trapped in a sub-par relationship.
15. You’ve experienced a ton – so when the time comes to settle down you’ll be ready. Especially if you’ve dabbled in online dating – then you’ll REALLY be ready.
Sure, I’d love to stumble upon a great guy, fall in love & share a life together. I can’t force it. I can only hope I’m fortunate enough to meet someone and live out the whole “happily ever after” ending. Until then – life as a thirty-something single isn’t too horrible. Besides, the grass is always greener on the other side.. until you get there.
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